arrogant, am I?

Two days ago, I realised I'm an arrogant person.
I myself hate it when I behave that way.
Hate it.
Shouldn't have done that.
But I couldn't help it.
Its just sometimes I feel I need to present myself with confidence, but I think people may read that as pride.
And people will see me as an arrogant person, not someone with confidence.

At work, I need to act professional. Must always appear professional, strong and confident. Sometimes I feel it is hard to act all lemah lembut and berbahasa bunga-bunga penuh kias whatsoever, just to show that I'm being polite to someone else.
Because I feel, even though without 'sugary-acts' I still can (and am) polite and I do respect other people, especially the elders.

But somehow, when I'm around my distant family members and relatives, I feel secluded. I don't really fit in. I've observed this a few times, and I still fail to fit in.
Perhaps its because I rarely see them that I begin to find them strangers?
Or is it because I'm too arrogant to accept that I am still in their league, and I'm still one of them?